The longest distance in the entire universe is that from one's head to the heart!

My dear, dear readers! Do I still have some of you out there? If you are around come by and say hi! Well, Life has been very challenging for me lately. All my life I was kind of protected, shelled from dispair, misery or tragedies. I would contemplate few different scenarious in my head, but that would be as far as I would experience it, just in my head. I had always been kind of care-free, live for today kind of guy. And reality of life was one that was relatively happy, peaceful and predictable. Did I have adversaties? Sure. But did I handle them well? Well, not really. I alwasy thought adversaties were just like a potholes. You try to avoid them at all cost but if you do hit them in the middle of the road, just ignore them and go on with the rest of the trip. Not for a minute I would start thinking about adversaties in a way that others do. May be adversaties are given to us or created to us to either learn from them or is a way of Life to seek our attention. Kind of like a symptom is a a warning sign that not everything is so rosy in ones's castle. Well, to be continiued! My boss just called me into her office so I have to rush but I ll be back. I promised to do a vide blog and I will. Its coming and its coming very soon, hopefully today. Stay tuned my friends and I will update you on whats going on with my mom, myslef and my adversaties! But all I can tell you now is that I am growing up. A bit late at 37 but thats the road I chose.

Thank you all from the bottom of my heart!

I want to express my deepest gratitude and appreciation to all of you guys for you support and kind words!

All roads lead to death! But timing of it is crucial!

I am going through one of the most difficult period of my life. My Mother have been having flank pain under the ribs on the right side for 4 months now with accompanied fever. She had done some test but nothing was specific enouph to diagnose a problem. I took her to ER last friday and they found multiple nodules-lesions on her liver and both lungs. She has always been a glue of our family and a survival of two cancers before. I just hope and pray that there is small chance it could be infection or something treatable. I will start video bloggin soon!

Doctor, can you diagnose me as weird and not a failure?

I want to share a nice joke I once read. It is in russian so I hope it doesnt lose a meaning in translation. Here it is! A young woman goes to a doctor and complains that her husband cant satisfy her. The doctor sais" Well, why dont you find yourslef a lover then? A woman replies" I did, and he doesnt hit the spot either" Well, sais a doctor why dont you find a second one? A woman sais " I have four of them , and none can really satisfy me. You know what sais the doc, you are very strange! Thanks God doctor sais the woman! Can you give me this diagnosis in writing that I am strange because everyone keeps saying I am slut!!!!! Well, I have failed again! I gained 5 pounds back. And it is getting personal to a point where I am not angry but rather curious. I wont call myself weird or a failure! I must learn myself and understand why I subotage myself the way I do and how to keep emotional eating at bay! So this is my next trial. I hope to blog soon again and keep it somewhat consistent. If there is anyone still listening, thanks! And I do mean it from the bottom of my heart!

So much to share, so little time!

Ok guys, as pormised I am writing this very post. Lots of things changed since I last wrote the post. I now do own a wondeful Ragdoll baby boy. He is full of energy, spunk and attitude. But he is simply an invaluable addition to my family. He is a pain in the rear side at times but what a gift! I had to drive 5 hours away to get him from a breeder. Ragdolls are hard to come by where I live and I wanted to make sure I got him from a reputable place. I know some people will never understand why buy a kitten instead of rescuing one, but both I and my parents are very inexperienced cat owners and adopting a cat can and is very challenging at times. Raising a baby is much easier as he is still litte and growing up. He is still full of challenges but I am so happy to have him. His name is Saadya and I will post pics of him soon. Did you know that there is just as much controversy in the cat food industry world about whats to feed a cat as in human one. Lots of cats are coming up with same diseases as humans, especially diabetes. Know why? I think you probably do. Becuase many cat food manufacturers are using soy, corn meal and other cheap carb substitutes to make the food. And cats, unlike humans are completely carnivores not omnivores. So I had to buy him much more expensive food which is the lowest carb content on the market. So, yes, my cat is on the low carb too!


Ok, now a bit of update about me. My symptoms of irregular heart beat, tachycardia, headackes and general fatigue seem to subside and walk away, knock on wood. I am pretty sure that all that scare was attributed to induction. At least thats my biggest hope. For the first 3 days I had no appetite and felt completely awful,so bad that life itslef seemed like punishment. Thanks God I am better now. I will continue to blog my menus and my struggles, but forgive me if i miss a day or two, lol or week!


My weight is 230 pounds now! I did lose 5 pounds but need to lose 60 more.


Today I ate:

Breakfast: 2 chicken meatballs with spinach, artichoke and sun dried tomatoes
1/2 cup of mushrooms
2 oz pistachio nuts


Lunch: 1 can of water packed sardines with avocado, roasted pepper and grilled eggplant slices and squash



Dinner: 1 can of water packed sardines with avocado, roasted pepper and grilled eggplant slices and squash

I will be back tomorrow!

I am fine, my cat is a joy and I will be back tomorrow blogging! I am honored to still have you guys believing in me and checking on me! Thanks!

I must get this fat monkey off my back!

I dont know if anyone is even listening at this point, but just in case anyone is here is whats been happening. I have been on a relatively low carb regimen and it worked fine, but no weight loss. I did eat to satisfaction and even a bit more at times. I enjoyed it too. I ate sweet tasting food and loved it. I would eat wholesome food as well but needed to supplement it with sweet tasting snacks and mostly at night. I loved low carb carb countdown chocolate milk sweetened with stevia and mixed with frozen berries and silvered almonds. But weight loss it wasnt. My health scare seemed to subside. It was truly scary and very debilitating. I dont know what it was and will keep praying its over. But here is my resolution for the next two weeks. I need to start reducing waist wise and fat wise. I need to stop using sweet tasting food and go to the foundation Atkin based induction for at least two weeks to get my weight on downward trend. So starting Friday I will embark on two weeks Atkins induction and I pray I will not go through induction flu that will bring on those scary irregular heart beats and extreame fatigue. But somehow I think it wont. So beginning Friday I will blog my new journey every day. If anyone is still listening off course!