Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Whats the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Whats the difference between Santa and Vadim?

The difference between Tiger Woods and Santa is that Santa actually stops after only three...... Ok, you get it, funny, ha ha ha! I was t9old this joke today at the staff meeting and wasnt lauphing. My boss, who happens to be vice-president, looked at me and said " Vadim, its three hoes, get it? Hoes as in...., I stopped her and said " I know, Meg. It wasnt funnu not becuase I didnt get it, it wasnt funny because it just!!! She said I have Russian sense of humor andf everyone of those suckers started laughing again. I wonder at times how low can people go to satisfy the boss. Everyone is petrified of this woman except me. And I get it, people do need jobs and those who have got them are not eagor to let go. But I just despise fakeness and ass kissing! I honestly think people like Tiger are not cheating becausing they are addicted to sex but because they miss true friends and need others to validate them. How many folks do you think are around Tiger that would do or say anything to just make him look and feel like a King. Not me!!! I am a nice guy, I think, or I tend to believe I am, but I am not going to tell anyone they are skinny when they are fat or tell them their joke is funny when its not. My boss was suprised I wasnt laughing but I simply said the joke was ok, and that I heard it before. I think she took it ok, but if she didnt, well, its her business. But the difference between Santa and me is that I do nooooooooooot deliver on my promises or challenges. I have beeeeeeeen very bad, very! I keep eating and gaining weight. Its insane. The funny thing is that I stopped having all kind of symptoms when I when I ate carbs so somehow my subconsciuos mind feels its comforting and safe for me to eat crap. I must go back on low carb, preferably low carb express. This is getting to be very imprudent. I will keep you posted, but for now its another failure of massive proportion.

By the way I saw documentary called " Food. Inc" last nighgt. It was eye popping expereince. Did anyone else see it and what you gusy thought of it? Not that I had no clue, but it was even more shocking than I thought it was.


Harry/JP said...

I heard a cute joke about Santa today. Have you heard of the "four stages of Santa"?

The First Phase is when you believe in Santa Claus.

The Second Phase is when you DON’T believe in Santa Claus.

The Third Phase is when you ARE Santa Claus.

The Fourth Phase is when you LOOK like Santa Claus.

Maybe it was the delivery of the joke or it's reception (by a radio host) that brought a smile to my face.

Anyhow ... I wish you well on regaining your footing, Mr. V. Hang in there and keep looking for the right inspiration. It's out there!

~Oct said...

And I have a Tiger joke. :) It's okay if you don't think it's funny because I rolled my eyes when I heard it. lol

Did you hear that Tiger Woods is being forced to change his name ... he has to change "Tiger" to either "Lion" or "Cheetah". :P

I'm with Harry ... hang in there Vadim. I know it's tough, especially at this time of year.

Vadim said...