Sunday, November 30, 2008

I hereby declare a war on my fat cells and my emotional monster!

I had a herendous day today, so bad that I decided not to even write what I ate. It was nonhumane treatment, cruel and unjust punishment. I will not even contemplate to write it down otherwise I will have suffered form post food stress traumatic disorder. But the good news I still ate low carb! A whooooooooooooooooo looooooooooooooooooot of it, but low carb!

Overall I ate: 1/2 jar of almond butter ( throughout all day)= 1350 cal= 7 carbs; 1 carton of countdown milk= 800 cal= 25 caRBS; 8 EGGS= 650 CALORIES= 4 CARBS; 4 OZ BEEF= 250 CALORIES; 2 OZ ALMONDS=360 CALOIRES=5 CARBS; 1.5 CUP OF BLUEBERRIES=100 CALORIES=10 CARBS; 5 CUPS OF COTTAGE CHEESE=1000 CALORIES= 25 CARBS;

TOTAL CALORIES= 4460 CALORIES
TOTAL CARBS= 75
TOTAL EFFORT = 25 %
TOTAL EXERCISE= WATCHING FOOTBALL ON TV ALL DAY LONG ( LOOKING AT MY CALORIC INTAKE, I SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE ONE PLAYING IT!)

SO TODAY, MONDAY, DECEMBER 1 ST I, VADIM CHERNOV, HEREBY IN WITNESS OF MY DEAR LOW CARB FRIENDS, SOLEMNLY SWEAR:
1. STICK TO MY 5 PLUS ONE AND ONLY PLAN
2. TREAT MY BODY WITH RESPECT FOR AT LEAST 30 DAYS
3. STOP EATING AT 10 PM, PERIOD, END OF STORIES, YOU HEAR ME FAT CELLS AND EMOTIONAL MONSTERS!
4. BE FRIENDS TO THOSE WHO LOVE ME AND LOVE THEM BACK, SO I WILL TREAT YOU WITH OUTMOST RESPECT ( LIVER, HEART, KIDNEYS, SKIN, PANCREAS, BRAIN0) .IF I FORGOT FEW OTHERS I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE.
5. EAT CONSCIOUSLY AND FOR THE RIGHT REASONS.

SO HELP ME GOD!!!!!!!!!!!

12 comments:

Harry said...

Amen, brother!

You're going to beat that emotional monster and learn to respect your body, mind and spirit! I just know it! Why? Because I see it in you. Others have done it and we can do it.

But, enough with the pep-talk. I still think you should post yesterday's menu. Why not do so? Fear? Frustration? Shame?

I can't think of a good reason not to post it. Accountability is part of the deal, remember?

If I'm going to try to be a palm tree, I expect you to be one too, darn it!

Monday's are always good days to start fresh. Let's do this thing!

Can you believe I typed all this after drinking a glass of wine?

Lynn said...

Vadim,
I'm WITH you!! You CAN do this. Getting "mad" gives you energy for the war! There comes a time when we need to enter the next phase of our life, right?!

Erika said...

Hi Vadim,

Them's fightin' words!!

;)

P.S. I still think you should write what you ate though - you might be able to keep it from us but you can't keep it from your body and that's what this whole quest is about! No?

Vadim said...

Thank you all for your inputs. Harry and Erika I will put up my last night binge eating just to show you guys how incredibly hungry emotionally I become at times that I block out all my senses and just pig out. The only consalation in last night's binge was that I swore to keep it low carb abd I did, even though I was tmpted to eat salty chips. I didnt. So if I could control not eating junk carbs, it should be as easy to control junc low carb. Lynn, I didnt forget you, thank you for support.

Lora said...

Take it easy, Vadim. It will get better. Once in a while the floodgates will open. It happens no matter what our best intentions are.

Monday is here and get back on the wagon!

Take care.

Solshine said...

Hi Vadim,

I am climbing back on the wagon with y'all today and feel it is a perfect day to start over - It is not only a Monday but also the first day of the month. *smile*

You make very logical (and valid) points and I just know that you are able to do this. You are properly focusing that anger - on your fat cells and your emotional monster. That's a good thing! Sometimes we have to get to that point to see the results we so desperately want.

Vadim said...

Harry, I am a palm tree today! the storm is over, thanks God! I feel better, and I trust myself! I have been struggling with my self-esteem for many years, hence smoking and overeating to compensate for feeling out of control. Now its time to start loving myslef, not only consciously , but subconsciously as well. If not now, when? If not me, then who? Palm tree is back growing ever so strong within me, so help me Lord be strong enouph and resist the things I can resist , change the things i can change and accept those things that I cant change. Today is a brand new day, brand new month and hopefully brand new attitude. Thanks as always to all of yopu guys for being here and being involved!

lynn said...

Hey vadim

I think you need to eat more real food; more meat. Nuts and AS just feed cravings.

Try a solid day of meat at every meal and I bet you will feel less tempted.

Vadim said...

Lynn< i will as soon as my experiment with shakes is over. I am afraid it is my emotions thats I am feeding not the cravings. I never feel hungry enouph where I am craving smng that bad. It usually when I am emotionally stressed out. It used to be ciggarettes, but now its food!

Alex said...

Vadim,

Good luck my friend!

You are a riot, I love to hear you screaming at your fat cells.

Alex

Vadim said...

Yeah, Alex it is quite a stormy relationship I have with my fat cells! lol, some days we get along and others not so sweet. But I have had it with them lately, they havent exactly behaved. I guess they started missing their cousins that left the house, they want them back! But no way, no how!

Harry said...

Good for you, for having the courage to post your binge.

That took guts, Vadim.

Well done. :-)